Recently, I face many problems which really makes me feel vulnerable. However, I manage to control my feelings. That's why people out there everytime see me as a happy guy but actually deep within my heart, there are many things that really disturbs me.

As we get older, the challenge we face are different when we are younger. It becomes more complicated and really testing on our decision making skills. If you take the wrong step, things will be worsened. For me, I don't know whether I took the wrong step or not.. But one thing thats clear, this problem is like getting worser.

Yesterday, I manage to spent time with myself after being so busy with all the work I have to do. I manage to muhasabah diri (do some reflections) on some of the incidents and problems I've been facing. And it really helps. I'm able to think more clearly and wisely.

All these incidents that happens to me, has really open my eyes on how problems that you never ever expected to occur, did occur and thus caught you unprepared. I'm so stress up when talking about it. For me, I'm not a materialistic person because I prioritize my family, religion and friends. But sometimes some friends does not deserve to be prioritize because they just don't. If they don't care about me and doesn't take the initiative to take care of my feelings, why should I? Why everytime I have to take care of their feelings? It's not fair... However, I'm a compromisable and forgivable person. I know human beings are not perfect including myself. People do make mistakes. So I like to forgive people but each individual do have their own limits. So when you make mistakes don't keep on repeating it...

Haiz.. I really don't know what to do now...

do you feel, what I'm feeling now?

Labels: Confuse